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"You often have a redness about you,...
{ 11:58, 2010-Feb-12 }
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"You often have a redness about you, muchacho,"
Wireman said"I don't think it's an aura, exactly,
and it's not exactly a thoughtI've gotten it from you as a word as well as a
color on three or four occasionsAnd yes, once
when I was off Duma KeyWhen we were at the
Scoto
"When I was stuck for a word
"Were you? I don't remember
"Neither do I, but I'm sure that was itRed's a
mnemonic for meFrom a Reba McEntyre
song, of all thingsI found it almost by accident
And there's something else, I guessWhen I forget
stuff I tend to get
"A little pissed off?"
I thought of how I'd chanel flap bag taken Pam by the throatHow
I'd tried to choke her
419
"Anyway, I guess that red must have gotten out and
stained mymy mental suit of clothes? Is that
what it's like?"
"CloseAnd every time I sense that around you, in
you, I think of waking up after putting a bullet
in my temple and seeing the whole world was dark
redI thought I was in hell, that that was what
hell was going to be like, an eternity of deepest
scarlet"Then I realized it was just
the appleIt was lying right in front of me,
maybe an inch from my eyesIt was on the floor
and I was on the floor
"I'll be replica tiffany jewelry damned," I said
"Yes, that's what I thought, but it wasn't
damnation, only an apple'In Adam's fall, sinned
we all' I said that out loudThen I said,
'Fruit-bowl' I remember everything that happened
and everything that was said over the next ninetysix
hours with perfect clarity"Of course I know some of the things I
remember aren't true, but I remember them with
exquisite precision, all the sameNo crossexamination
could trip me up to this very day, not
even concerning the pus-covered roaches I saw
420
crawling out of old Jack Fineham's eyes, mouth,
and nostrils
"I had a rolex watches knock offs hell of a headache, but once I got over
the shock of the apple close-up, I felt pretty
much okay otherwiseIt was four in the morning
Six hours had gone byI was lying in a puddle of
congealed bloodIt was caked on my right cheek
like jellyI remember sitting up and saying, 'I'm
a dandy in aspic' and trying to remember if aspic
was some kind of jellyI said, 'No jelly in the
fruit-bowl' And saying that seemed so rational it
was like passing a sanity testI began to doubt
that I'd shot myselfIt seemed more likely that
I'd gone to sleep at the dining room table only
thinking of vintage gucci watch shooting myself, fallen off my chair,
and hit my headThat's where the blood came from
In fact, it seemed almost certain, given the fact
that I was moving around and talkingI told
myself to say something elseTo say my mother's
nameInstead I said, 'Cash crop in the groun,
lan'lord soon be roun'"
I nodded, excitedI had had similar experiences,
not once but countless times, after coming out of
my comaSit in the buddy, sit in the chum
421
"Were you angry?"
"No, serene! Relieved! I could accept a little
disorientation from a knock on the headOnly then
I saw the gun on the rolex watches for sale in the uk f
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